On a recent podcast, author Robert Cialdini described a French social experiment involving a young man and a whole lot of female shoppers who did not know they were part of psychological research. The young man’s job was to record his success rate for his direct approach to the ladies roaming a shopping mall: “Excuse me, can I have your phone number so that I can call you later for a date?” All over the mall, this approach garnered a phone number 13.5% of the time.  However, the researchers discovered there was one particular place in this mall where his…

Three or four months ago, Melissa got it in her head that she was going to do a 21 day fast from all sugars. There is a website that offers support and guidance from a Christian perspective in this endeavor, revelationwellness.org, and Melissa got busy recruiting some friends to join her. Nobody was in favor of doing it over the holidays, of course, so we kicked the idea into the new year.  I’m so glad I joined in. A fast that requires this much self-control and planning is much more likely to succeed with some support. The website gave medical…

My conclusions from giving up sugar entirely for three weeks can wait until tomorrow. First, I wanted to follow up yesterday’s post with a short explanation of one of the greatest lessons the Lord taught me in 2020. I can now testify to the very real possibility of obeying what the Spirit commands in James 1:2-3 – “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because (There’s that word again!) you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”  I survived some crazy trials in 2020 and now I’m working on James…

 For most of the lifespan of this blog, it has been common for posts to be published at intervals of weeks and even months. And unfortunately, when life as a missionary or parent or teacher got most interesting, posts often grew particularly sparse.  At the end of 2020, though, I made a commitment to myself to write and publish something on a daily basis for at least 30 days. Today marks day 31.  (Pardon me while I pat myself on the back for keeping my promise even in the midst of starting a new job, learning 80 new students and…

 So Robert Cialdini explains that humans like to be given a reason; we like to hear a “because”. But his only explanation for this is that it is somehow hard-wired into our brains. I don’t know. I’ve been paying attention to how I feel differently when students ask “Can I go to the bathroom?” and when they ask “Can I go to the bathroom because …”. And I am beginning to form a hypothesis of my own. I think that when a favor is asked without the “because”, I (we) assume a reason … and it’s typically a negative assumption. …

 In his book Influence, author Robert Cialdini relates an anecdote about a Harvard social psychologist who ran a little experiment at a much-used library copier. In a variety of ways, she would ask permission to cut in line to make her copies and then record the success rate for each approach. So when she said, “Excuse me, I have five pages. May I use the Xerox machine?“, she was allowed to cut in line 60% of the time.  When she switched her request to “Excuse me, I have five pages. May I use the Xerox machine because I’m in a…

I’m working hard at being patient with my classes this time around. And that can be tough. These guys and gals have a tendency to blurt. (Which, by the way, is a hilarious word. Blurt, blurt, blurt.) Sometimes they blurt answers to my questions, sometimes they blurt their inner thoughts, and sometimes they blurt pure nonsense. They blurt over the top of me. In the past I have worked hard in such situations to enforce the “hold your silence and raise your hand” routine. It tends to take more vigilance than I can muster for too long. And besides, it…

 When I was a kid, I thought people were born with a certain set of talents. Some had lots of talents and some had very few. It was the luck of the draw and I concluded that I was unlucky.  If I tried something new – especially anything athletic – and I couldn’t perfect my technique within the first 10 minutes, I threw in the towel. No talent.  It never occurred to me that the people who were really good at playing the guitar or diving or dance all started out clumsy and clueless. I had no idea that they…